It's the act performed to create life, not something you do because you've been going steady since 10th grade. Nos partenaires et nous-mêmes stockerons et/ou utiliserons des informations concernant votre appareil, par l’intermédiaire de cookies et de technologies similaires, afin d’afficher des annonces et des contenus personnalisés, de mesurer les audiences et les contenus, d’obtenir des informations sur les audiences et à des fins de développement de produit. whenever you have sex, and this case, it's the first time for you, you release a chemical into your system that's rarely released, it's pretty much only released for a few occasions. The fact that you have self-respect, waited until you felt ready and waited for the right person is what makes you special and that's not going to just go away anytime soon. Though my parents never fed me any of that kind of shit/we're as sex positive as they could be with a teen who didn't want to talk to their parents about sex and I thank the universe every day that I escaped those years without buying into that stuff. I guess I always felt like being a virgin was one of the things that made me special, or different. Vous pouvez modifier vos choix à tout moment dans vos paramètres de vie privée. How common is it for a couple to be the same height and age as each other? I was eighteen, and in a serious relationship, and it felt right, and I don't regret it at all, but at the time I felt like I'd just moved into a new era of me. It was something that had to stay miles away from my mind which was supposed to stay pure, just like my body. Everything was fine before during and after, but lately.. Do not leave him. It angers me that people are robbed of their ability to enjoy themselves because of religious influence :(, New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I also grew up in a Christian household, so I understand that. I think it's not the virginity that made you special and now it's gone. I’m planning to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It keeps you protected, and it keeps your swings to a minimum. Girlfriend upset I haven't asked her to marry me.? I lost my virginity to him last Friday, it was great and we both enjoyed it a lot. I definitely felt proud in high school that I never gave up my virginity, because I had been taught that kids probably weren't mature enough to have a sexual relationship and it really wasn't a good idea. Placing importance on it only sets people up to feel less than for engaging in something perfectly normal and healthy and natural. It's really really toxic for those ideas to be perpetuated. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. As for him he is acting this way because he seems to regret having sex with you and he cannot cope with this. I was 20 when I lost my virginity. Should I just wait until he moves here to see if things will get better? It'll wear off in time, just try to take your mind off it like writing a story or drawing, making love poems or whatever is your hobby (: I think its because you hold something in your mind and fantasize about it and get excited about it happening.. and that lasts for so long. What about virginity made you feel special or different? I felt bad, because I felt like it was hyped up so much but it was a let down sorta. I'm just sayin! I've been feeling depressed. I wasn't someone to just casually sleep with someone. I had heard stories of people who had lost their virginity going to the bathroom to cry after, regretting giving it away to someone who didn't care about them, etc. I feel like it's a somewhat normal reaction. I was sad because it wasn't everything I had hoped it would be. AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. Informations sur votre appareil et sur votre connexion Internet, y compris votre adresse IP, Navigation et recherche lors de l’utilisation des sites Web et applications Verizon Media. Helped me put it into perspective. Was it the sex? f*ckd up) not real long, maybe 5-10 minutes, but it gets frustrating when you're used to getting a reply within a minute, he just gets on my nerves a lot! yes i understand what is ur situation right now, so i suggest u to marry her, i assure u that after marriage you both will so happy for ur life. By the time I was older I felt more embarrassed and worried that I would never lose it, and was terrified that I'd end up like The Forty Year Old Virgin. Pour autoriser Verizon Media et nos partenaires à traiter vos données personnelles, sélectionnez 'J'accepte' ou 'Gérer les paramètres' pour obtenir plus d’informations et pour gérer vos choix. yep virginity is (highly) overrated and you're feeling all mixed up, was it anything like you expected it to be? Sex - the physical and emotional - should be a positive experience. How come all my crushes in school are dating 35 year old pedophiles. I think I did make it part of my identity and now I'm trying to convince myself that it is not part of what makes me me, or makes me special. I would like a up date for dr simon ngui? Girl I feel the same you do, I lost the big V to my boyfriend Thursday, it's only a temporarily feeling. They said you should make sure you're fully compatible before a big commitment like marriage, and to do that you had to experience those things. Secondly, when they do show someone losing their virginity, the guy always climaxes in 2.2 seconds and the girl bleeds because her hymen has been busted wide open! When I finally lost it at 21 to my SO, who I am still with today, I actually felt happy: I had waited for someone I truly cared about. I was a little sad but not heart-broken. If you'd like to edit it out you can- let me know when its done and your comment will be approved. I'm curious as to why you feel sad. I don't regret it at all but I'm surprised at the sadness I feel. Is it because I lost my virginity which is a really big thing in life? I've never wanted to break up for good and even if I tried, I couldn't do it.But now I'm telling myself I can do it and get through it? prob not, it's ok, you're still the same person just growing up some, i'd take it slow and let yourself settle down. your feelings will sort themselves out in time, give yourself a chance to process what happened. I lost mine at 17 and I still feel like it was a bit too soon. If you've been raised to think you're worth less without your virginity like most religious women are, you will probably feel a bit of sadness/guilt when you lose it. This comment has been removed for using gendered slurs. You have not lost anything from your worth as a person :). I like how people would be impressed when they found out. Edit: a day later and i'm still so angry that you have to unlearn 21 years of worth of internalized slut shaming and I feel like maybe I didnt say enough. Why do I feel this way? Even when I was religious, virginity was never a part of my identity. lol I made the mistake of losing my virginity young, before I was married and I regret it. Because you don't know how to feel after losing your virginity. At the same time, I wasn't just going to lose it for the sake of losing it because it's an important thing to me. Virginity is a bullshit concept to begin with. Then, with practice and communication, it got much better, and I felt better about it. I could tell that he cared about me and cared that I was enjoying myself too. If everything felt OK and was all consensual then I'd say you had a great time. It may sound a little melodramatic, but there's my answer to you - I know how you feel, I think. I think for them it was part of how it was ingrained that they need to stay pure for their husbands and that made them feel bad about it. If you can't control your mood swings, I would consider birth control. This is due to the hormonal changes and can make you feel extremes of either of the emotions. I felt like I grew up a little too fast in that aspect of my life. I was, because I realised I was actually growing up and I loved my childhood way too much. Cause I did something that was really intimate and never done before. It's up to you how you define it but please don't feel like it changed you at all. So, when I eventually did have sex, it kind of felt like I was just like everyone else. Now it's not there. My boyfriend and I have been together since June 14th, 2010.. so a little over 2 years, we live an hour apart, but see each other often and he's moving closer to me in October.